I was speaking with another Pathworker today, and we touched on the topic of the Pathwork’s history of attracting people, swelling in numbers, creating a strong sense of community for a while, and then shrinking in size. This is a pattern that has repeated more than once. My friend suggested that it may occur because the Pathwork encourages independence, that people come into the Pathwork dependent on others, on their beliefs, on their childhood wounds and the re-creation of those wounds; and as they heal themselves, they become independent and move away and begin their lives anew, often starting their own organization or company.
This has always been an area that, for some reason, frustrated me. It felt as though the people who did this gained a lot from the Pathwork but did not stick around afterward. Instead, it seemed (to me), they went out and became known for their own endeavors and in some cases didn’t even credit the Pathwork for helping them get there.
As I discussed this with my friend, I suddenly got a visual image of a trampoline. The trampoline is the Pathwork. People climb on board and begin bouncing, letting themselves go higher as they get more comfortable with themselves and knowing they can handle whatever forces are at work on them and within them. Eventually, they can fly and leave the trampoline.
Around the trampoline are the spotters, those of us who remain to teach the Pathwork and guide the people who come to us. Our job is to make sure people stay safe on the trampoline, sometimes encouraging, sometimes asking them to slow down a bit and concentrate on a new skill they are learning. And then our job is to celebrate the victory of seeing them take flight.
Perhaps I have paid too much attention to those who leave, who fly into their own endeavors. Perhaps I have missed them and felt lonely. Perhaps I need to focus more on who is coming onto the trampoline next.
It’s a great analogy, Dottie – a good one, in general, for all things that come in and out of our lives. My small addition to what you wrote at the end would be that maybe there can still be a connection to those who have “flown off” by wishing them the best and being happy for them as they go into their new ventures (kind of an indirect focus remaining without totally disconnecting – and at the same time, not holding onto them).
By: Sheldon Cohen on April 1, 2009
at 2:24 pm
I agree, Sheldon. Each person internalizes the Pathwork in his/her own way, and they become a unique blend of Pathwork and all their other experiences and knowledge. There are artists, singers, song writers, authors, business people, all kinds of folks, who offer unique contributions to the world. Those contributions have been affected by the Pathwork and the way it has influenced them. But it has also been influenced by all the other experiences they have had. And yes, that connection can, and does, continue much of the time. And the way I wanted to hold on probably had more to do with my own wish to be dependent than on their independence. That’s why I wrote the piece–I was able to see things differently and move on. And, as you said, be happy for them and still stay connected. Thank you for adding your comment to this. It’s a good one.
By: dottiejt on April 2, 2009
at 12:22 am